Friday, July 22, 2011

Hearty Cheers to Mothers

First, let me use this platform to share my thoughts and express my opinion on the idea of a mother. It’s every woman’s dream to bear and nurse a child in her bosom, right from teenage years and adolescence, a girl fantasizes on the concept of romance, marriage, and family. However, motherhood is not merely about child bearing, it’s beyond the painful pangs of nature in the labor room, it’s inconsequential that you carry a child for several months in your womb, even an incubator can do that.
Biology has so limited our understanding of motherhood that we have failed and forgotten to understand it’s true meaning.
Motherhood is a state of the heart, it is spiritual and it is a calling from God.
Science may deny you a labor room experience but it cannot rob you off the Joy of motherhood.
Motherhood is God’s purpose for every woman, and you don’t have to wait for a test result to step into the role of a mother, you don’t have to discriminate between your child and the help, you need show no special fondness or favoritism, this may seem impossible, but we must awake to this consciousness. It breaks my heart, to see women of estimable calling and destinies get lost in the tedious task of petting and pampering their children, oblivious to the things around them that are screaming for their touch. It cuts deep into me to see women loose sight of life’s meaning, all because they yet to be graced with a nine month experience.
Motherhood is essentially role play, stepping into the shoes of a ready nurturer and caretaker, it is not limited to the genetics of your x and y chromosome, and hence should not be restricted to that.
Motherhood is thinking of hungry and unsheltered children even while nursing your own, it is nurturing a seeming destitute even whilst waiting for your own, it is the heart that constantly cries for hope and the hand that consciously reaches to help.
Motherhood is a divine assignment, a spiritual partnership with heaven, it is the highest call of service and yet highly unregarded, a call of nature that has been answered by very few.
Having said all these, there’s a set of mothers I’d like to celebrate. Women who have been bold in their resolve to show love to humanity, who have dared to look beyond the tears rolling down their nose, women whose contribution to society has depicted the true nature of sacrifice, I mean, the mother Theresa’s of our time, and there are quite a number of them.

To the mother who cries night after night, praying for a child from her womb, believing in a hope that belies medical evidence, yet, daily gracing friends and colleagues with a smile as bright as light, remaining submissive and virtuous, even in the glaring face of hunting in-laws, whose only cry is for a child or her blood.
To the single mother, who was confident enough to embrace a mistake, resolving to nurse a teenage pregnancy, blinding her eyes to the tempting option of an abortion. Quick to embrace parental rebuke and societal condemnation, without a man, she steps into the role of father and mother, and what an excellent job she does.
To the mother who was once married, who was betrayed, beaten and kicked out of a marriage she had carefully built her life around. Who have faced the sharp slicing pain of rejection, denied custody of the children, yet, living each day deliberately conscious of her value and her contribution to the society, refusing to take a No from Life.
To the mothers who are all around us, teaching us, scolding us, loving us against all odds, award winning mothers who have compromised career opportunities, battled between promotions, maternity leave, and  PTA’s, To every woman, who though did not birth us, have loved us, at every time where it really mattered. Nannies, teachers, aunties, girlfriends, wives all round us ,mothering us.
Finally, to the very special apple of my eye, the woman after my heart, A mother in whom I am well pleased, , super woman with a super heart, so what if you are not on facebook? I still think you are cool. Lol!
Hearty cheers to my mum, and to every  mother; I love you all…MWUAH!!!

© Tochi Eze


Dreams come true; I know your heart is laden with the heavy burden of an idea, plan, vision or mandate, you run with a pure passion to fulfill purpose and your quest for relevance has become a source of motivation. In the night season, when the imaginations of your heart are seeking for a voice, crying to be heard and begging to be seen, be rest assured that your restlessness is divinely ordained.

Dreams come true; although doubt may plague your mind, her vicious grip choking the faith right out of you, the bitter memories of yesterday’s fall leaves you trembling in dismay, and wondering if you labor in vain expectation, be strong in believe, for greater feats have been achieved by men of smaller frames, and the one who gave the dream will surely bring it to pass.

Dreams come true; and in bright and vivid pictures too. It doesn’t really matter how lofty or ludicrous yours may be. So whether it is to be president or pope, baker or barrister, if your desire is noble, you will inspire the divine force that drives dreams into reality.

Dreams come true; yes, all things are possible! So vanquish your fear, for your faith will find expression in tangible substance. You will awake in the morning to a song of celebration, as life’s delicacy will be laid before you in an open invitation to a glorious feast of fulfillment.

Dreams come true; they may be processed in the incubator of time, delayed but will not be denied, because eventually, time will unfold, whether in a minute or in a millennium, the Heavens will open, God will remember you and Destiny will happen!
 (c) Tochi Eze


Life throws you hard punches, painful blows that are hardly ever fair. Often times you are betrayed by the people you love, our trust is breached and our pride is bruised. Things happen that leaves us hurt and we are left to heal in the embers of time; unfortunately, time heals the wound but doesn’t always clear the scars and so you are stuck with the glaring consequence of a painful past.
How do you even begin to deal with issues that tears at the security of your heart? How does a man handle the infidelity of his wife? I mean you take an oath for better or worse yet nothing really prepares you for the sharp stab of pain that comes from catching your wife physically entangled with your home plumber. Perhaps that is a tad extreme, not everybody experiences that in a lifetime yet we all have our personal betrayals and bouts of depression.
Parents betray Children and vice versa, bestfriends lie or suddenly change, a business partner dupes you, colleagues frame you up at work, someone steps on you in the market, the customer rep in the bank talks rudely to you…Sometimes it almost seems the world is out to ruin your good intentions, but in all of this I have learnt to deal with unwholesome situations not the way I feel but as God in his word would have me respond. Basically, to FORGIVE!!!
Let me share something I have learnt, Forgiveness is not the aftermath of an apology and it is not always served best with a hot meal of repentance; Forgiveness is a higher dimension of faith, an expression of the ultimate command of love, and a gift to the offender but moreso to yourself. It is a Bold assertion of spiritual maturity and it bears with it complete healing and restoration from all the hurts.
Granted, it is no small a feat but look at it from the perspective a friend shared with me ‘we have been forgiven to forgive’ Yes, while we were yet sinners Christ died for us. I don’t know what it is you’ve been through and I will not presume to put myself in your shoes, but I will tell you one thing, your ability to forgive is a major factor in your Life’s growth.
So whether you were sexually abused by a family member as a child,
Your spouse was and is still cheating on you,
Your pastor/cell leader takes advantage of you,
You’ve been spited, slighted and gossiped about,
You experienced a major breakup for which you did nothing,
Often misjudged, misinterpreted, misinformed,
Take a decision to love regardless of whatever; it is an act of faith and one that Heaven does not overlook. To do otherwise will amount to a Life of unfruitfulness; like a tree planted by rivers of water yet only decays.
Do it for the offender, do it for God and do it for yourself.
© Tochi Eze
July 15th 2011